


Secret Agent Fictional

by queersuperteens (ruffboi)



Category: Newsflesh Trilogy - Mira Grant, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-16
Updated: 2012-11-16
Packaged: 2017-11-18 19:00:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/564248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruffboi/pseuds/queersuperteens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Buffy has a secret job, with a secret boss.  Unfortunately, Secret Boss Phil Coulson just went and outed her to her OTHER bosses...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Secret Agent Fictional

**Author's Note:**

  * For [taibhsearachd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/taibhsearachd/gifts).



> Wrote it for my lovely wife on a dare, I do believe.

It wasn't that there weren't organizations other than the CDC, of course, but for the most part normal civilians (and even normal journalists) never really dealt with them, at least directly.

So the strangely silent and intelligent zombies were unnerving and terrifying enough, but it only got weirder from there when SHIELD suddenly showed up, dropping from helicopters, screeching to a halt in personel vehicles and SUVs. Shaun and Georgia were both more than a bit blindsided by the sudden appearance of the organization with the most conspiracy sites dedicated to them.

A middle-aged man who looked like some sort of office manager but walked like he was comfortable being in charge in almost any situation got out of one of the SUVs and approached the three of them. "Agent Meissonier, report," he said, as he neared them.

Everything got exponentially weirder at that moment.

Shaun and Georgia both turned, slowly, to look at Buffy, who was standing behind them looking embarrassed. Shaun couldn't keep the incredulous look off his face, but Georgia's was completely unreadable. "Um, look, guys, it's--"

" _Agent_ ," the man said firmly, and Buffy huffed a little.

"You know I hate it when you call me that, Coulson," she told him, almost scolding.

"I need to know what happened," he reminded her.

Buffy started at the beginning, telling the story in her usual manner - with occasional tangents and absolutely no desire to break the narrative flow to make it more concise. Shaun leaned closer to Georgia.

"Is is just me, or is our tech wiz and fictional a member of a mysterious spy organization?" he asked under his breath.

"It is _very_ much not just you," Georgia answered.

"Bets on how much of an NDA they're going to make us sign before we get to go home?"

"I plan to be very fucking thorough when I read it." Buffy was showing some footage to the man - Coulson - who was apparently her boss. "If there's a loophole, I plan to find it."

They fell silent for a moment.

"Hey, you think she'll save any of the footage?" Shaun asked eventually.

Georgia just sighed.

By the time the SHIELD agents had finished eradicating any evidence of what happened and Buffy had finished giving the story to Coulson, it had been almost an hour, and Shaun and Georgia were getting restless. Coulson approached with Buffy trailing behind him, and Georgia stood, feeling Shaun stop pacing just behind her.

"I'm sorry we had to interrupt your investigation like this," Coulson said calmly. "Also that we had to delete all of your data from today. I'm sure you understand."

"Not really," Georgia said. "Enlighten us, please."

"Agent Meiss--"

"Oh come _on_!" Buffy interrupted indignantly. Coulson sighed softly, and very briefly pinched the bridge of his nose - clearly Buffy was a tiring person to handle, and that made Georgia smirk.

"Fine. _Miss_ Meissonier will give you a full explanation, or as full as she is legally allowed. We do ask that you don't discuss today's events with anyone."

"Or what?" Shaun asked, as innocently as he could.

"Or you'll find your careers and reputations not worth as much as they are currently," Coulson said simply. "Don't misunderstand me, I think you're probably good kids and I know you're good at what you do. But we are very good at what _we_ do, and any attempts to make this into news will end with you being completely discredited."

"So you're threatening us?" Georgia pressed. "Not even bothering with an NDA, just outright telling us that if we breathe a word, you'll ruin us? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm relatively sure that's _illegal_."

"Thank you for your cooperation in this matter," was all Coulson said before turning to head to his SUV, the SHIELD agents moving out almost as quickly as they moved in.

"Hey!" Shaun started to head after him, but stopped when Buffy grabbed his arm.

"You _really_ don't want to do that," she said matter-of-factly. "He's in a bad mood today, I think he got called in on his day off for this."

Shaun and Georgia shared a look, and then turned to stare at Buffy.

"Explain," Georgia said flatly.

"It's not a big deal!" Buffy protested. "Usually I'm just working on security stuff for them, getting information. It has _nothing_ to do with you guys and the stuff I do for you, I've never given them any access to or info from our servers or anything!"

"How the hell did you get involved with them?" Shaun asked, his voice edging into nearly-cracking-from-disbelief territory.

"Weeeeeell I sort of hacked them a couple years before I met you," Buffy admitted sheepishly. "They basically told me I could work for them or I could be pretty much put under house arrest. Which wouldn't suck on the leaving-the-house front so much, but I'd have, y'know, people watching me and going through my stuff, and monitoring all my computer usage and building projects. So it wasn't exactly a hard decision."

"So you're... a government agent," Georgia said finally.

"Only technically," Buffy protested. "And I hate it when they call me that."

"Then we won't," Shaun assured her. "Now, I think your buddy said something about an explanation?"

Buffy made a face and sighed dramatically. "Come on, I'll tell you on the drive back."


End file.
